23.2.09

I believe the sun also rises/Drying our tears, bringing the blue skies of day

Well, my aunt passed on Wednesday night. I was numb about the whole thing; still am, actually. I barely knew her, rarely saw her, so it's strange, more than anything. She'd come to visit every couple of years for a week or so, so that's actually going to be the hardest part--accepting that she's never going to come visit again. My mom is devastated, but she's coping remarkably well.
Remember the coworker I was talking about awhile ago, the one with lung cancer? She passed yesterday. That one hit me a lot harder, because I'd seen her so much and we would get letters and phone calls from her at work sometimes. Several clients close to her are also really sad. I spent a good part of the night at work trying not to cry. Sad example: Awhile ago everyone who worked with her was offered the chance to buy one of those tacky little jelly bracelets with inspiring messages on them (these particular ones were yellow and said, "courage"), and the money was going to go to the sick staff member. The clients closest to her received them, too. Anyway, this morningI was working with one client, let's call her Y., who had an especially close connection with the staff member. After helping her dress, I offered her the bracelet, and she said, "It doesn't matter anymore, because she's dead now."
Work is going to be hard for awhile.

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