If I could be your angel/Protect you from the pain

This past week has been hard. Not just from the Headache (which made me throw up this morning), but...in some ways visiting Nate was a bad idea. It reminded me of how completely alone I am here. I have no friends here, none. It's odd, I mean...Ok. I'm a misanthrope. I don't like people. It's not that I dislike people in general, it's that I dislike most people specifically. The vast majority of people. But even I know that I need friends, or at least acquaintances, or something. Even if it's just once a month, once every two months, someone to spend even half an hour with in a social manner. Just having that option. And I don't even have that. I've got my parents, who resent me because they see me as a testament to failure (I'm not, and resent the implication, but whatever) and my siblings, who are (respectively) 18 and struggling with his own problems, and fifteen and therefore too young to be burdened with my problems. So guess what I do? When I really need to bitch, I hunt down my sister and burden her with my problems. I'd bang my head on my desk at this point, except my head is already killing me and I doubt I'd remain conscious and I have to be at work in forty-five minutes.
Which is a handy seque into work. I don't like my job. I'm not keen on some of my coworkers, and a couple of the clients really tick me off, but for the most part I'm ok with them. It's the management that really bugs me. They're looking out for the bottom line (read: money) instead of the best interests of the clients, and that infuriates me. I don't have enough time to rant about this, though, so on to other things.
I got my hands on Anti-Meridian a few days ago, which is the third and (very sadly) final album by Brave Saint Saturn. While Within Temptation remains my favourite band, BSS is definitely my second--has been for a very long time. You know how most bands take at least a year, usually more, to write an album? Their first, which is my favourite of the three (though the third is working its way up there) was written in three weeks...and it's got the only song that I've ever heard that's ever made me cry.
Anyway, in my very first blog, which was definitely more lighthearted than this one, I would occasionally post poems and song lyrics; and I think that I'll post the lyrics to one of the songs from Anti-Meridian. It's called These Frail Hands.

In this broken place where I was born
It seems there is no peace,
And the very soil that we walk upon
Is filled with tears that never cease,
And you can trace the scars of hopelessness
Like sweat upon the backs
Of all the outcast downtrodden,
Water slipped through cracks
Hold on,
Hold tight
And I am overwhelmed
With grievousness and suffering,
For those who lack the voice to speak
For those of us left uttering
Pain does not prevail,
Dear Lord,
Your love will never fail
And these frail hands,
They tremble as they pen for us their last
And these weak words,
Can never say what cannot be surpassed
When the concrete of the world
Becomes too cumbersome to lift,
And the cataracts of fear and doubt
Cloak truth beyond what we can sift
And darkness, darkness breeds its way,
When crippling anguish clouds our sight,
The ghosts of dusk can’t bear their teeth,
Set their claws to bring the night
Hold on,
Hold tight
Darkness can’t perceive
The light, the likeness
This has shield from,
And though its wings may shroud the skies,
The dark shall never overcome
Light of the world,
Your love
Has never failed
And these frail hands,
They tremble as they pen for us their last
And these weak words,
Can never say what cannot be surpassed
I need your love,
And most of all I want to feel your peace,
I need your love,
Let everything that you are not decrease,
And these frail hands,
They tremble as they pen for us their last
And these weak words,
Can never say what cannot be surpassed
I need your love,
And most of all I want to feel your peace,
I need your love,
Let everything that you are not decrease.

And that's all, for now.