Thinking but not acting/that they're not to blame

So apparently people need a how-to guide in order to talk to me, which I find both offensive and funny. I'm not hard to talk to, people. I go Librarian-poo for other reasons--namely, fear. And panic. But mostly fear. If you want to talk to me, just follow these 3 easy steps:
1. Open mouth
2. Speak words
3. Repeat or shut up
See? it's really not that hard. I'd recommend you try it sometime. You'll find I can be quite amusing, rather cynical, and a sometimes intelligent conversationalist.

On a different note, I've been crying off and on for the past several days. Since Wednesday night, to be specific, so I suppose that qualifies as several. I didn't think it would hurt this much. I guess I cared/care more than I thought. But if just friendship is what you want, then I'll be more than happy to take that. I just don't want you out of my life. I was stupid enough before, out of jealousy and anger that you left (I was vain enough to read it as leaving me). I don't want to do that again, go through that again. Take your month, or year, or as long as you need. But...come back. Please.

God, I'm such a girl. What's wrong with me? Well, as C. told me, the thing about being a girl is that we get to act like it sometimes, and I suppose that's true. Well then, here's hoping I don't do it too often. It makes me feel vulnerable and weak, and we all know how much I enjoy that.

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